Cal Jacobson’s Blog

I’ve just read my last few posts. Damn, I’m an angry bastard. Need to cut down on the caffeine.

So there I was, minding my own business while driving to work this morning, and somebody at CBS or ABC or whatever damn network provides the local station with national news made the decision to hand a microphone to an idiot.

<Happy Voice, “Pomp and Circumstance” plays in the background>
Graduation is right around the corner, and many seniors are looking forward to the excitement of having their name called and walking down the aisle to receive their diploma.

<Music ends, idiot switches to his Mr. Bad News Voice>
But an increasing number of students won’t get to graduate …

And that’s when my head exploded.  “Get to graduate?”

Get?

Maybe I’m just showing my age, but when I graduated high school (back in 1988, shortly after the Renaissance) students had to earn a diploma.  You know, by taking tests and reading and writing and stuff.  I didn’t even apply myself in school, yet still managed to graduate in the middle of my class.

When the hell did a high school diploma become a right?

Those of you who had to drop out to support your ailing mother and 85 younger siblings, pipe down.  You guys are a statistical blip, outnumbered by the legion of mouth-breathers who can’t apparently squeak through public education with a D-minus.  The same goes for everybody who had a serious medical condition in 12th grade and needed a quintuple organ transplant: you guys get a pass.  I’m baffled by the huge number of future service industry employees incapable of following along in class, let alone trying to make change.

Am I out of touch here?